My Life As Liz: Even in 2010, Teenagers Will Be Teenagers

     So, earlier this week I was flipping through the channels and I saw that My Life As Liz was on. Mental Dialogue: Oh, I've heard of that show. The girl on there kinda looks like Hayley from Paramore. Cool.
And I watched it. I watched a 'reality' show on that God-forsaken channel, that is MTV.

Y'know what? I liked it.

   The storyline was so easy to relate to! And yeah, it's probably scripted, and isn't flawless, but that's the POINT. I read something on this website where some chick was attacking Liz for saying 'Whatever...MTV made me do this." What?! It's a joke!
Quote from the WWW:

"To actually be a 'dork' implies some degree of social ineptitude or embrace of aspects of culture that may not be considered cool or mainstream, but which in turn unite those social outcasts in their own small way. Hot chicks co-opting the term 'dork' to make themselves appear more adorable [...] undermines the entire concept of the term, and insults actual dorks Middle Earth-wide."

   The thing is, in whatever part of Texas she's from, owning a lizard, shopping at thrift stores, being vegan, reading comic books, hanging with the guys, and red hair aren't cool or mainstream. And why can't a dork be hot? Huh?

   The people who toss insults at this show are mostly older that the character, right? Soo...In there world, Liz would be considered 'cool' or 'popular' or 'edgy'. In my school, Liz would just be a nerdy weirdo. Kinda like me. Which is why I love the show!

Finally, MTV has created a show that I can fully relate to! w00t!
 The whole 'I used to be best friends with the popular girls' thing?  Check.
 Non-mainstream (for your school, anyway) taste in music?   Check.
 'Odd' clothing choices?   Check.
  Sarcastic sense of humor?   Check.
  Repulsion toward the more..*sigh* 'popular people'?   Check.
  Hanging with guys a lot?  Check.
  Slightly geeky choice in books? Or reading AT ALL?  Double check.


    "Glitter is the herpes of arts and crafts. It never goes away."

	Chromeo - Fancy Footwork .mp3
	Found at bee mp3 search engine

"If you're going through hell, keep going..."

It's incredibly dark in my house right now.
There are absolutely no lights on whatsoever.
The only light is coming from my laptop screen, which is a bright white,
and in contrast makes everything even darker.
I can just barely see out of the back windows...
I see a sky turning dark slowly.
Behind the trees...

I look out towards the front of the house,
through a slit between the curtains.
The street lights are on, but brighter.
More vivid than usual.
The light cascades over the ground.
Slowly...

Every once in a while the wind blows,
rustling the leaves on the road.
The lights in the homes are off.
There's no one in the streets.
The ghost town...

There is perfect silence.
Creatures hidden away in the forest,
people hiding from the dark,
That you fear...

A fear they thought they'd left in their childhoods.
But there is no dark.
The moon is brighter than the sun.
Brighter than the screen of my laptop.
Clearly visible through the atmosphere that
Will be destroyed...

What lurks in the hidden corners of the world,
Is woe.
The rare light you see always comes
By Friendly Fires.

the Panopticon

       The Panopticon was a kind of prison designed by late eighteenth/early nineteenth
century philosopher Jeremy Bentham, which was never actually built.
      The arcitecture of Bentham's Panopticon was created to allow watchmen to look
at all his prisoners without the prisoners knowing whether or not they were being observed,
making them feel as if they were being constantly watched by an omniscient being.
      In other words, everyone in the Panopticon knew they could be watched at all times, so
in the end, only minimal watching actually needed to happen. The Panopticon would create a sense
of paranoia so pervasive that it's inhabitants became almost self-governing.
      In the book 'Discipline and Punish' Michael Foucault uses the idea of the Panopticon as a
metaphor for modern Western society and its emphasis on normalization and observation.
Meaning, we live our lives in places that operate like the Panopticon. Schools. Hospitals.

Factories. Office buildings. Even the streets of the city.

Someone is watching you.

Or, someone is probably watching you.

Or, you feel like someone is watching you.

So you follow the rules whether someone's watching you or not.

     You start to think that whomever is watching you is larger than life. That the watcher knows stuff about you that you've never told anyone. Even if the watcher is a total stranger on the street.

      It's a systematic paranoia. Like, when you double dip and you have that creepy sense that everyone knows you double dipped, even though you did it a week ago and there's no evidence whatsoever.

      Or when you're alone in your house, and you go to use the toilet and lock the door behind you anyway.

Another example: You're alone in your room and you pick your nose. And you can hear your grandmother telling your slimy, nose-picking self  to use a tissue.

And that horrible queen-bee popular girl--you can hear her nasty voice back in the 3rd grade when she caught you wiping a booger on the underside of your desk, caling you 'booger-eater' for the rest of the year, even though you obviously weren't eating your boogers if you were wiping them on the desk.

       So it's not that you either pick your nose because you want to pick it, or you don't pick your nose because it's germy. It's that you are having a mental conversation with all the forces that could be watching you and condemning you for your nose-picking (potential or actual)--even though rationally you know that noone can see you.

That's the Panopticon.

Musing.

Edit: This was all written as a memo on my BlackBerry. Now it's on my blog.

The Tomato and the Blueberry:

A tomato may be a fruit, but it is a singular fruit. A savory fruit.
A fruit with ambitions far beyond those of the average fruit.
What do you do with your average fruit? Nothing, you just eat it. No one is ever going to found
an entire meal on a blueberry. Can you imagine it? Everyone would be so sick of them
within a week they'd starve to death. The blueberry has no versatility. The country with
a cuisine based upon a blueberry would be a country of lunatics, turned mad by the unwavering
sameness of their daily meals.
the Tomato > the Blueberry

"Though this be madness, yet there is method in't."
Shakespeare: Hamlet Act II

"Much madness is Divine's Sense--To a discerning eye."
Emily Dickinson

"Information is of no value for its own sake, but only because of its personal significance."
Eric Berne

"We know what we belong to, where we come from, and where we're going.
We may not know it with our minds, but we know it with our roots."
Noel Coward* 'This Happy Breed'
*What a terrible last name!

"On such a full sea we now foat, and we must take the current when it serves, or lose our ventures."
Shakespeare: Julius Caesar Act IV Scene III

"To be what we are and to become what we are capable of becoming, is only the end of life."
Robert L. Stevenson 'Familiar Studies of Men and Books"

"Ne knows not his own strength that hath not met adversity."
Francis Bacon 'Of Fortune'

"Of equality-as if it harm'd me giving others the same chances and rights as myself-as if it were not indispensabe to my own rights that others possess the same."
Walt Whitman 'Thought'

"To multiply the harbor is not to reduce the sea."
Emily Dickinson

Comin' Home

Well, I've been down to Georgia

I've seen the streets in the West
I've driven down the 90, hell I've seen America's best
I've been through the Rockies, I've seen Saskatoon
I've driven down the highway 1 just hopin' that I'd see you soon

Cause I'm comin' home, I'm comin' home

I've never been to Alaska, but I can tell you this,
I've been to Lincoln, Nebraska and hell you know it ain't worth shit
I've been through Nova Scotia, Sydney to Halifax
I'll never take any pictures cause I know I'll just be right back

Cause I'm comin' home, I'm comin' home

I've seen a palace in London, I've seen a castle in Wales
but I'd rather wake up beside you and breathe that ol' familiar smell
I never thought you could leave me, I figured I was the one
but I understand your sadness so I guess I should just hold my tongue

But I'm comin' home, I'm comin' home

I know that we're takin' chances, you told me life was a risk
but I just have one last question...
will it be my heart or will it be his?

I'm comin' home 

City & Colour - Comin' Home ♥

"When I'm 32 I'll be miserable...

...everything around based on principle
well, i had a clue, wouldn't it be nice
to never be alone in this wasted life."


I'm really, really, sorry about that last post.
It was disgustingly floral and happy and...pink.

But the title was a quote from the song in the video at the end of the post,
and the quote was a reference to an incredible book called Stargirl :)


So, yeah.
To make up for the pepto bismol pink of the previous post,
I'm giving you *drum roll* my NEW FAVORITE SONG!
*crickets*
Ehh...screw you!

♥

"I'll never be you're Leo..."

*gasp* Uh-oh! Looooove compatibility!

Aries + Leo

                 Both of you are spirited lovers. With both of your Venuses in fire signs, you and your partner approach love in a fiery, direct manner. Sparks fly between you! Each of you falls in love quickly and intuitively, although your partner tends to take love a little more seriously than you do. Both of you are rather me-centered in love, which of course can be somewhat problematic! You and your Venus in Leo lover are competitive folk—just be sure you don't compete with each other too much. Friendly competition can be invigorating, however, and can help maintain the vigor and excitement you both crave in love. You admire each other a great deal, although your pride may not allow you to show that admiration all the time. Because your temperaments in love are similar in many ways, when the relationship is good, it's very good; when the relationship is bad, it's very bad! The ego-stroking and flattery that your partner craves may not always be forthcoming with you, because you incline to be somewhat blunt and unpolished in style. Your partner is likely to appreciate your simple charm, or find it infuriating. Probably it's a bit of both! Your partner's style of expression in love is certainly more flowery. Chances are just as good that you will find your partner exciting and infuriating at the same time! Let your lover know how special he or she is, but in order for this to work, he or she will definitely need to share the spotlight once in a while. You are both strong people in love, and you can have a lot of fun together.                These partners have genuine admiration and respect for each other, but they need to learn to take turns commanding and giving orders — even when they’re only choosing a movie at the video store! This partnership is all about fiery passion, domination and who’s on top — and when! Both Signs can be impatient and proud. Leo likes to be adored and their egos to be stroked, services which easily-bored Aries may not want to provide. Leo may also be bothered by Aries’ flirtatious nature — but this relationship is always exciting. Despite their sometimes noisy differences, Aries often looks to Leo as a guide or counselor. Leo is the Lion and, with Leo, Aries can be the lamb. As in the myth (The Lion and the Lamb), any differences between these two can be overcome.
             Aries is ruled by the Planet Mars and Leo is ruled by the Sun. Both are masculine energy archetypes, and together they make a good combination — they understand each other because they’re coming from the same place, so they’re highly compatible and can make a powerful team.
           Aries is a Cardinal Sign and Leo is a Fixed Sign. Aries gives Leo the assertiveness to charge ahead and take chances, while Leo can help teach Aries to stabilize and follow things through. Aries may sometimes hurt Leo’s feelings by saying something hurtful without thinking. Conversely, Aries may be irritated by Leo’s bossy nature and tendency to sulk. But they’re both loyal and care about each other deeply.




♥